Complex Trauma and Depersonalization/Derealization
Have you ever been daydreaming?
In the middle of a redundant office meeting? Driving home on “autopilot” or while cooking a family dinner?
I bet you have.
Nearly everyone has this kind of experience at least ones in a lifetime.
But what if you find yourself stuck in a dream world unable to escape? [Read more…]
Traumatic experiences are often lost in time and concealed by shame, secrecy, and social taboo. – Vincent J. Felitti, MD
Exhausted, you fall in bed.
You stretch your aching body under the sheets and close your eyes. Waiting for relief…
But your mind won’t hush.
Thoughts, replays of conversations—real and imagined—start running through your head like a circus carousel.
A never-ending dialog with yourself. And your mom. [Read more…]
If someone asked you about your childhood, what would you say?
“I don’t want to talk about it,” or “There’s not much to say,” or “Nothing was wrong with my childhood”?
Perhaps you wouldn’t remember much even if you tried… except your mother’s icy face, your dad’s angry voice, or your uncle’s drunken laughter…
And your fear of being in this unsafe and dangerous world.
Scared and sad, you had no one to talk to. No one who would listen and understand. [Read more…]
Understanding your symptoms
Are you in a state of constant alert, forever searching your surroundings for signs of potential danger?
Like something bad is going to happen… again?
Sigh…
Your mind flips endlessly through the painful memories of your childhood, flashing frightening images before your inner eye.
At night, it plays horror movies for you till you wake up perspiring and terrified, desperately looking for something familiar to tell you you’re safe.
You can’t relax and everything feels unreal.
Are you ill? [Read more…]
Imagine…
You wake up in the morning refreshed and energized, feeling that your life is real, not a dream.
You smile at your reflection in the bathroom mirror and say hello to a busy blue titmouse in a birdhouse outside. Then you enjoy your morning yoga routine while bathing in the sun flooding the room.
Feeling strong and capable of facing whatever challenges life throws your way. That, no matter what’s going to happen, you will be fine.
Sigh…
Instead, you wake up tired and overwhelmed. You drag yourself out of bed, log in to your Facebook account, and get stuck. One more day in a prison of the past.
Your childhood wounds are still bleeding. Living with the consequences of a childhood emotional abuse makes it hard to live in the now and find happiness.
Happiness isn’t for you. At least, not before you’re healed… right? [Read more…]
“To shine your brightest light is to be who you truly are.”
― Roy T. Bennett
“Yes, mother.”
You disconnect and stare hopelessly on the phone.
Your blood is boiling and so is your mind.
Argh.
Another Sunday with your mother.
All you want is to spend the day at home–just you, honey and your kids. [Read more…]
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