Imagine you’re the Queen of a little Kingdom.
Your castle is clean and tidy. Your garden looks immaculate. The lawns are freshly mowed. Bushes and trees trimmed. Passages look like carefully drawn lines.
Everybody knows your love for perfection.
Across the river lies another Kingdom ruled by a King. An arched, elegant bridge plugs into the shores of each side, linking them together.
You love the King. He’s brave, good-looking, and reliable. Good at protecting his citizens from an ugly Troll living nearby in a Gloomy Forest, spreading fear around him.
But you don’t like the King’s Castle. It’s full of weapons, old furniture and dusty books. His taste in clothes and food makes your nose wrinkle. He has no interest in his garden either. It looks savage and forlorn.
The King loves you, too. And he learned that to meet you he must go over the bridge.
Sometimes he stays long, and you feel spellbound by him. He follows you wherever you want to go. He supports you in whatever you want to do.
You forget that he has a Kingdom of his own.
But one morning he’s gone.
You feel betrayed, hurt and angry.
“All he needs is here, in my Kingdom. Why couldn’t he be happy?” –
prickly questions torture your mind.
You Want to Know Why
So you rush to the Bridge.
“Why did you leave me?” – you demand.
The answer is silence.
Shaken, you run back to your Castle, shut the door and cry bitter tears of loss. For the first time since you were seven.
Exhausted, you fall asleep…
…You’re in a secret meadow hidden from the rest of your garden by enchanted trees.
In the middle, surrounded by the pool of white daffodils, is your Father.
“It’s time.” – he says before dissolving in a shimmering cloud.
“What do you mean, daddy? What do you mean?”
…You wake up and see an elderly man in front of you. Though you haven’t seen him for years, you know who he is.
“When you need advice go to the Wizard” – your Father told you before the Witch of Fog stole his mind.
“Go back to the Bridge and cross it.” – the Wizard says warm but firmly.
Your mind rebels. You feel anxious and insecure. You can’t do it on your own.
You Need Help
“I can help you if you let me” – the Wizard picks your thoughts.
Standing by the Bridge you can barely breathe.
“What shall I tell him?” – you cry.
Hesitantly, you set one foot on the Bridge and start walking.
At the far pillar of the Bridge, a Guard suddenly blocks your path.
“The King is not expecting you” – he exclaims. “What’s your business here, milady?”
Incensed by his rudeness, you want to leave. But the Wizard grabs your elbow fast and firm.
“I wish to speak to the King.” – you say. “Would you, please, ask his Majesty, if time is good? Thank you”.
You watch the Guard disappear, and the King steps out instead.
His eyes are curious but kind – “What do you wish to talk about?”
Goosebumps pop out on your skin like mushrooms pop up after a summer rain in the woodland.
“My Castle is empty without you. I want you back.” – you say and look away.
The King’s quiet for a moment, then he says – “I’m sorry you feel lonely. But I’m not coming back. I wish you well.”
Your heart drops.
Have You Lost Him Forever?
You wonder. And you make yourself busy. Not to think about the King. Not to feel your burning heart.
But those long nights…
Lying in your empty bed, you hope for every shadow to be his.
One sleepless night you climb to the Tower and silently sit down in front of the Wizard.
“Forgive me” – you whisper – “for being angry with you. I miss the King terribly. I don’t know what to do.”
“I feel your pain.” – the Wizard nods. “The Bridge’s your only chance. You must go.”
And I’m Always by Your Side
Next morning a page-boy runs to the King with a letter from you. Asking permission to visit his Kingdom. When the time is right.
“All you can do now is wait.” – says the Wizard.
While waiting, you often go to the Wizard. To calm your mind and soul.
You tell him how much you miss your Father. That you haven’t seen your Mother, the Witch of Fog since she took your Father’s memories away. Your strong love for each other always made her jealous.
You tell him things you never told a living person before…
Then one dazzling day an invitation arrives. Tomorrow you’re going to see the King.
What’s Waiting For You There?
Passing through his garden, you notice new flowers, well-groomed trees and bushes in blossom. Visible paths covered with tree bark. And a revived old fountain sprinkles colourful sparkles of water in the air.
“Your garden looks lovely.” – you say in awe.
“Thank you.” – he smiles.
“I want you to know how sorry I am. I was busy showing you my Kingdom, but I ignored yours. Please, forgive me.”
“I already have. Shall we start over?”
“Gladly, my King.”
Discovering His Kingdom
And so it goes. The bridge between your Kingdoms is always open for one of you to cross.
Sometimes you talk, and sometimes just walk silently through the gardens. Sometimes you laugh and play silly games.
His castle still looks messy but clean. You’ve learned to appreciate its treasures and enjoy the calmness of its cool chambers.
You ask the King about his old swords, and he tells you stories about each of them. He knows all of his books that have been in the family for centuries. He tells you about the Troll, who now peacefully lives in his Forest with a friend he found.
You still talk to the Wizard sometimes. But one day he says: “I’m here to say goodbye. You were trapped in a mirror of self-absorption, but you broke out. You’ve learned your lesson. ”
Have You Learned Yours?
Love is not about possession but respect.
It’s about a balance of powers.
About togetherness and separateness.
Taking and giving.
One itsy-bitsy change in your ruling can bring you closer to your partner. And to happiness.
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